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The Framily Plan: Week 5- Marriage & Relationships

Leading and Leaving a Legacy of faith and love in our marriage & relationships means killing the villain within

 1 Samuel 25:1-12- Then David moved down to the wilderness of Maon.[a] There was a wealthy man from Maon who owned property near the town of Carmel. He had 3,000 sheep and 1,000 goats, and it was sheep-shearing time. This man’s name was Nabal, and his wife, Abigail, was a sensible and beautiful woman. But Nabal, a descendant of Caleb , was crude and mean in all his dealings. When David heard that Nabal was shearing his sheep  he sent ten of his young men to Carmel with this message for Nabal: “Peace and prosperity to you, your family, and everything you own! I am told that it is sheep-shearing time. While your shepherds stayed among us near Carmel, we never harmed them, and nothing was ever stolen from them. Ask your own men, and they will tell you this is true. So would you be kind to us, since we have come at a time of celebration? Please share any provisions you might have on hand with us and with your friend David.” David’s young men gave this message to Nabal in David’s name, and they waited for a reply. 10 “Who is this fellow David?” Nabal sneered to the young men. “Who does this son of Jesse think he is? There are lots of servants these days who run away from their masters. 11 Should I take my bread and my water and my meat that I’ve slaughtered for my shearers and give it to a band of outlaws who come from who knows where?”

  • Killing Wickedness- The opposite of wickedness is Godliness. Godliness is developed in being with God. In being with him, we become like him. Godliness is formed through learning and growing in our love God, which is a response to knowing his great love for us. What we love is what we give the power to form us.

Ephesians 3:17-19 17 that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, 18may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, 19and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

  • Killing Rudeness (Crudeness, Ill-Tempered)- Rude Moods, Ruin Moods. The opposite of rudeness is kindness. Kindness is developed through knowing, and having deep gratitude for the kindness of God that leads our own souls to a place of repentance. Self-Righteousness often develops into Rude Moods and rude dudes.

Paul addresses those with rude, self-righteous moods, he talks about it in terms of judge mental people and this is what he says about how to kill the rudeness in our hearts Romans 2:4- Don’t you see how wonderfully kind, tolerant, and patient God is with you? Does this mean nothing to you? Can’t you see that his kindness is intended to turn you from your sin?

Marriage- Its not just what you say but how you say it! 

  • Killing Mockery- The opposite of Mockery is humility. Humility defeats self-importance. Mockery comes from viewing yourself as higher than and more important than others. Humility is considering others above yourself.

Philippians 2:3-4- 3Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves; 4do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.

Marriage- Willing and ok with being second. Celebrating others

  • Killing Foolishness- A fool says in his heart there is no God. The quickest cure for foolishness is the acknowledgement that God is alive and present, with us in everything, every situation, every scenario, every conflict, every relationships, every opportunity, he is with us always. Not as a God holding a gun to our head waiting for us to mess up but a God of love, friendship, compassion, full of grace and mercy, able and willing to give wisdom to those that want it.

James 1:5- If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.

Marriage and Relationships takes wisdom to work well. There will be circumstances you will not know how to deal with, God is there to help.

Leading and Leaving a Legacy of faith & love in our marriage and relationships takes Beauty, Wisdom and Generosity.

1 Samuel 25:18-19- 18 Abigail wasted no time. She quickly gathered 200 loaves of bread, two wineskins full of wine, five sheep that had been slaughtered, nearly a bushel[b] of roasted grain, 100 clusters of raisins, and 200 fig cakes. She packed them on donkeys 19 and said to her servants, “Go on ahead. I will follow you shortly.” But she didn’t tell her husband Nabal what she was doing.

Proverbs 11:24-26 “Give freely and become more wealthy; be stingy and lose everything. 25 The generous will prosper; those who refresh others will themselves be refreshed. 26 People curse those who hoard their grain, but they bless the one who sells in time of need.”

Leading and Leaving a Legacy of faith and love in our marriage and relationships though being a Peacemaker.

 1 Samuel 25:23- 31- 23 When Abigail saw David, she quickly got off her donkey and bowed low before him. 24 She fell at his feet and said, “I accept all blame in this matter, my lord. Please listen to what I have to say. 25 I know Nabal is a wicked and ill-tempered man; please don’t pay any attention to him. He is a fool, just as his name suggests.[d] But I never even saw the young men you sent. 26 “Now, my lord, as surely as the Lord lives and you yourself live, since the Lord has kept you from murdering and taking vengeance into your own hands, let all your enemies and those who try to harm you be as cursed as Nabal is. 27 And here is a present that I, your servant, have brought to you and your young men. 28 Please forgive me if I have offended you in any way. The Lord will surely reward you with a lasting dynasty, for you are fighting the Lord’s battles. And you have not done wrong throughout your entire life. 29 “Even when you are chased by those who seek to kill you, your life is safe in the care of the Lord your God, secure in his treasure pouch! But the lives of your enemies will disappear like stones shot from a sling! 30 When the Lord has done all he promised and has made you leader of Israel, 31 don’t let this be a blemish on your record. Then your conscience won’t have to bear the staggering burden of needless bloodshed and vengeance. And when the Lord has done these great things for you, please remember me, your servant!”

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